Dear Nomads
This weak ‘snooze letter is dedicated to the noble art of Hill Climbing in a thinly disguised attempt to drum-up some more riders for our biggest event of the year -the Ditchling Beacon Hill Climb on Sunday 29th October 2017.
Q1. So, what is this thing they call ‘hill climbing’?
Well, you cycle up a hill as quickly as you can! If you are a veteran (i.e. 40+) you will be given a ‘standard time’ which is essentially a set time that someone of your vintage and gender can be expected to achieve. If you ride faster than it you have a better than standard time, and the veteran who has the best time relative to their standard time wins! It’s all a bit complicated really, but thankfully there’s a spreadsheet that does all the maths so don’t panic. What it means is that for the veterans it’s a level playing field… except of course some skinny-powerful cake-dodging fecker will walk off with the top prize regardless of their age! For seniors there is no standard time coz we all know that between the ages of 18 to 39 humans are at their physical peak, but the second we hit 40 years old we stop holding our stomachs in and let it all out.
Q2. Ummm, this is a bit confusing… what does this have to do with me?
Essentially, unless you are whippet thin you haven’t got a chance of winning! BUT THAT’S NOT THE POINT! It’s meant to be a bit of fun – 8-10 minutes of pain on a cold October morning that will hurt at the time, but which you’ll be immensely proud to have done within moments of finishing! You don’t have to worry about what time you go up in or being ‘slow’ or even ‘last’, as the people that are really ‘last’ are the ones who don’t take part in the first place 🙂 By taking part you’ll be doing something awesome which you can then bore your grandchildren with in future years to come. You could even win a prize… you probably won’t, but you could!
Q3. Hmmm, you are beginning to persuade (or annoy) me… Do I need a special bike?
No any old bike will do, but as Hill Climbs are not controlled by the UCI you can have a lot of fun trying to strip down your bike to make it as light as possible. Typically, this may involve removing horns, bells, spokey-dokeys and the streamers that are attached to your grips. If you want to get serious you can have a go at removing seemingly non-essential parts from your bike (dustcaps, handlebar-tape, bottle cages, saddle padding, every second spoke, the left-hand crank arm) but you’d be better off eating a fistful of prunes the night before and popping to the loo 10 minutes before the event starts.
Q4. It’s starting to sound rather attractive! Will any other Nomads be riding it?
Yes, so far the following Nomads have signed up:
Male Juniors:
– Ben Griffin
Male Seniors:
– Eoghan McHugh
– Jason Blenkarn
Male Veterens:
– David Southgate
– James Hedley
– Kev Witton
– Michael Simpson (Michael actually joined the club so that he could take part in this event!)
– Alex Beyfus
– Steve Noake
Female Veterans
– Janet Clapton
…and that’s it so far. We’ll be joined by numerous riders from other clubs, but it would be lovely if this event had many, many more Nomads to ride it…
Q5. OK! You’ve totally convinced me! How and where do I sign up?
That’s the spirit! You can sign up and pay online here – simply click the ‘Enter Now’ button. It only costs £8 (plus a £1 booking fee), but you have to do it by Midnight on Tuesday 17th October. If you’d rather by cheque or cash get in contact with me by replying to this email and I’ll sort it out for you. Even if you’ve already volunteered to help, you can still ride the event… we’ll manage the event with just a handful of volunteers!
But hey, if that doesn’t convince you, how about this motivational speech from Dr Tim looky-likey Shia LaBeouf?
Ben Griffin Soars Again Conquering Twin Peaks
News of two more wins for the Nomads from the weekend – both by Ben Griffin in the Brighton Mitre Hill Climbs held on Saturday. Ben finished first in his age category on the climbs up Steyning Bostal and Mill Hill bringing yet more glory to the yellow and green jersey, and a bottle of wine prize for his dad (?). Chapeau to Ben! Meanwhile, yesterday, Gemma took part in the historic Catford and Bec CC Hill Climbs. Gemma was up against a top quality field which included many of the riders who’ll be heading to the National Hill Climb in Northumberland on the same day that we hold our event. Gemma is planning on riding the nationals this year, which, to my knowledge, is the first time the Nomads have sent a rider to any national championship since Geoff Smith went to the 24 hour TT a few years ago… so Gemma gets the second ‘chapeau’ of the week.
Nomad Down!
Neews came in last night that Helen Webb face-planted whilst riding her MTB in Spain. She managed to get away without breaking any bones but has some nasty cuts and grazes all over. The pictures are too grizzly to share with you, but if you are feeling brave or you’re a bit of a sicko you can take a look at them here.
Events in the Nomads This Week
Today
– you sign up for the Hill Climb by clicking here
Tuesday 10th October
– Kalas – Kit Order Deadline. Contact Adrian
– Committee Meeting – Get in contact if you’d like anything added to the ‘AOB’ bit of the agenda.
Thursday 12th October
– 7pm-8pm: Winter chain gang at Preston Park – Will it happen this week? Who knows! Join the WhatsApp group to find out!
Sunday 15th October
– 9am Club Run to RSPB Pulborough Brooks, Pulborough RH20 2EL
And if you want to start road racing next year there is another road racing certification event on Saturday 21st October at Ardingly Showground. Entries already open on Rider HQ Click Here